The Screaming Phase: Toddler Mom Life

Why does my toddler scream?

While it may seem like your toddler is lashing out against you during the screaming phase, it’s important to remember that this is all developmental. By exploring the power of their voice, and experimenting with what they can do with it.

Do you feel like any time you’re out shopping he lets it out?! It’s because not only are there plenty of new people to impress but also cool echoes, especially in malls and grocery stores.

Sometimes it’s purely for attention. It’s their way of saying, “LOOK MA!” Other times they scream when they want something they can’t have, such as ice cream or a parent’s expensive electronics. Screaming for these things communicates, “I want it!! Give it to me!”

Shouting back doesn’t help. It’ll actually encourage the behavior. Your best bet is to avoid situations that tempt your toddler to raise her voice and redirect attention when she does scream. Here are some ideas:

Find Places that are more “Screaming Phase” Friendly

As best as you can, try to work with your toddler's schedule. Making sure he’s eaten a solid meal and taken a nap can make things a lot easier.

I can remember times when I’ve been in no mood to be at the store, but as an adult, you have control of your surroundings to an extent. Toddlers don’t get to feel that control, screaming can help them feel that power

Ask her to use her “indoor voice”
If your toddler’s screaming because she’s happy, try not to comment or criticize. But if it’s really bothering you, ask her to use her indoor voice instead.

Acknowledge your toddler’s feelings

If your toddler’s screaming because she wants your attention, ask yourself whether she’s genuinely uncomfortable or overwhelmed. If you think the environment you’re in is too much for her, finish what you’re doing and leave fast.

If you think she’s just bored or cranky, acknowledge what she’s feeling. They will be comforted that you understand, and you’ll also help them learn how to put their feelings into words.

If you know your toddler’s raised the volume because they think they can get a cookie, don’t give in. You’ll just reinforce her behavior by giving her what she wants when she screams.

Instead, verbalize, “I know you want a cookie, but we have to finish this first.” Don’t bother saying they can have the cookie later if their behavior improves. Simply offer a cookie once you’re home.

Screaming Phase Fun

By allowing the screaming and saying, “Let’s both shout as loud as we can,” then join her in letting rip. Afterward turn down the volume by saying, “Now it’s time to see whose whisper is quietest.”

Follow this with nursery rhymes or songs like, “Head, Shoulders, Knees & Toes”. This will make screaming seem like just one of many fun things she can do.

Chat with your little one when you’re out and about telling them what you’re doing, pointing out all the fun things around you, and even saying hi to other kids can make your trip run smoothly.

Ask for help with choosing fruits and vegetables, and letting them pick items off the shelves will help them feel in control.

Offer toys and snacks. Just make sure you give them to your toddler before the screaming kicks in. Don’t wait for the screaming to start, or they’ll learn quickly that screaming gets results. Offer a snack or toy for calm behavior.

Ignore the Nonsense & Connect

For most parents, the hardest part of coping with the screaming phase letting go of other people’s judgemental looks.

Chat with other parents in groups like Vegan Pregnancy & Parenting and create an online support network to keep you calm and motivated when it comes to the toddler years!

Also, check out articles like Surviving Toddlers and Coping With Toddler Behavior Without Losing Your Mind.