After the first bit of panicking when I found out I was pregnant, I started thinking about the birth I wanted. A home birth would have been ideal but our insurance wouldn’t cover any of it and my pregnancy was so unexpected we didn’t have any money saved. That was out. A midwife in a hospital? Not bad, but the medical group we were seeing didn’t have any midwifes. Another great option gone. An unassisted hospital birth with just my husband and minimal nurses and doctors? That would have to do. I was okay with that, I really was. It put my husband at ease and I had been told the hospital followed birth plans very well. I then dedicated a ton of time to researching hospital births and birth plans. I quickly started writing my own so I would have plenty of time to revise it as my pregnancy progressed.
What I wanted was the normal “Hippie” stuff. Skin to skin, breastfeeding, delayed cord clamping, my husband to cut the cord, peaceful music, no “drugs”, walking, you name it I had it. I think my original plan was four pages. Ridiculous I know. As my pregnancy progressed things got harder, and more complicated. I changed my birth plan accordingly and I was still fine with what was going on.
At 30 weeks I was diagnosed with gestational hypertension, basically high blood pressure caused by pregnancy. I started seeing my doctor every week, twice a week. I was put on bed rest so I began to gain a little weight which didn’t help anything. At 35 weeks I found out I had developed pre-eclampsia. If I had been told if I can just make it to 35 weeks it would be okay. Just 35. My blood pressure got out of hand and the doctor decided to induce me at 37 weeks. On Halloween actually. I was okay with that. I could trade a perfect birth for a healthy baby.
The night before my induction I wouldn’t sleep at all. We got up early to head to the hospital, they go us right in, everything got started quickly and we were so excited. Everything was fine, contractions were bearable and I believed in myself. After increasing the medication until my contractions were a minute long and a minute apart and breaking my water I couldn’t take it any more and got an epidural. I was okay with that too. I could still do this. Yes I was disappointed in myself but I was having a baby before he was ready and I needed help.
A C-What? No, No That’s Not In My Plan.
You are not alone. There are a lot of badass momma’s that have unplanned C-sections and we rock. It does get easier to accept as time goes on and you meet more momma’s. Always know that you are “Woman enough” and tell your story with pride.