Three Easy Ways to Maintain Self Care For Moms
How do you maintain self care for moms?
Oh, mamas. We give so much, don’t we? We cook, we clean, we love, we listen. We are nurturers and we are givers. But how often do we bring that back full circle and nourish ourselves? Not often enough.
And here’s something I find really interesting—the majority of my weight loss clients are moms. Do you know why? It’s because one of the key things we have in common as mothers are that we give and give—and don’t always remember how vital it is to give back to ourselves and maintain self care for moms. So many of us have been taught that it’s selfish to prioritize our own self-care. That it’s noble to forego our own needs for others. But in reality, this creates an unhealthy pattern. We spend most (if not all) of our energy caring for our family, and then we feel depleted. And then what happens? Cookies and Chinese food, because those late night binges are the only thing we have that’s just for us.
Whether overeating plays a part in this for you or not, I’m sure you can agree that you’re not functioning your best when you’re overextended. When you’re not nurturing yourself, it’s much harder to make high-level decisions and take excellent care of your own needs. I learned this one the hard way too. As a new mom, I had so little time for myself to maintain self care for moms and ended up going to the “dark place” a bit (dark place being overeating and not taking care of myself). And as a single mom, I’ve had to be so mindful of this—if I get overextended, I’m no good for anyone.
So, here are three vital keys that will help us mamas take better care of ourselves—without the guilt:
Shift your Mindset. You’ve heard this before, and it may sound cliché, but it’s pretty darn important. If you surround the idea of self-care with guilt, you’ll want to work on that. As I mentioned before, so many of us are taught at a young age that it’s noble to forego our own well-being for others. That it’s “selfish” to prioritize our own needs. Now is the time to change those subconscious beliefs! So, how do you do that?
How about this three-part exercise? It’s surprisingly powerful and effective!
- Start by writing down your beliefs about prioritizing yourself, and self-care. For example: “I’m selfish if I take care of myself first, ” “If I take some me-time, my child will hurt herself,” or “It doesn’t matter if I take care of myself.”
- Next, question each of these statements. Ask yourself “Am I sure this is my truth?” (Hint: Your wise inner self will usually kick in and say “NO! Of course not!”)
- Finally, create some new beliefs that counteract each of the old ones. State them in a positive way, and make sure they feel good and empowering to you. You can affirm these new beliefs as often as you like—and even post them somewhere visible where you’ll be reminded of them during the day.
Self Care For Moms
Start Small. You don’t have to shake your world up in order to start taking better care of yourself. Especially if this is a new (and even scary) concept to you, it never hurts to start small. You don’t have to make huge leaps all at once in order to see progress. In fact, some of the best progress can be made when you just take small steps that are sustainable. For example, if you find the idea of scheduling a whole day of self-care unreasonable right now, start with just one hour. Think about some small things that would feel nurturing to you. Write them down and plan them into your schedule.
Remember, you are so worth it! Also, meditation is an example of getting a lot of “bang for the buck” out of a small step. If you carve out five minutes here and five minutes there to go to a quiet spot during the day to center, breathe, and meditate, you’d be amazed at the difference. Little steps do add up!
Get Away. You may love the bits out of your family, but to truly love them, you gotta leave em. You know that saying, “Absence makes the heart grow fonder?” Well, it’s oh-so-true! If you never get away and have you-time, you’ll end up feeling resentful rather than, um, fond.
In the early days of motherhood, I sometimes felt guilty for resenting my child, but that’s because I wasn’t getting any time to myself. Not only was I overworked, overextended, and maxed out, but I was feeling guilty about it! I still remember when my daughter was in her first year. I almost never got time to myself back then and walked around in a perpetual state of guilt and frustration. The first time I had a chance to finally go off by myself and have some me-time, I came back feeling so refreshed! I remember thinking, “Wow! I’m actually happy to see my daughter right now!” It hit me at that moment—I simply could not let that happen again. I had to start building in more me-time, as it made me a happier person, and hence a better mom.
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Tags: feeling overwhelmed, new mother support, self care as a mom, self care for moms, stressed out with motherhood