Getting your teenager to study

Today’s Parenting Headache, How Can I Get My Teenager To Study

by | June 6, 2018

How Can I Get My Teenager To Study?!

Constantly asking, how can I get my teenager to study, is a struggle that a lot of parents face. Do you wish they cared more about studying? This is a challenging problem for everyone involved, and there’s no easy answer. However, there are definitely a few things you can do to guide your teen towards better habits.
First of all, make sure your teen’s lack of interest in school isn’t masking a bigger problem. Are they happy overall—or is there some depression going on? Often when kids are depressed, it’s reflected in their school work. So, begin by having an open discussion with your teen. Tell them that you’re there to help and that you want to know what’s going on because you care. If they confide in you that there are deeper issues, then you’ll want to address them first.
Once you’ve hopefully ruled out depression and/or other emotional factors, it’s time to get down to business. Have an open discussion with your teen. Ask them what’s going on. There is a solution to every problem. This is no exception. Perhaps your teen isn’t studying as much because they’re feeling lost in class and have given up. Or maybe you’ve been too lax in your discipline, and they’ve gotten comfortable with low expectations. Asking how can I get my teenager to study, is a question many parents face, and you are not alone.

How Can I Get My Teenager To Study?

For example, I have a friend who went through this very thing with her son recently. She was at her wit’s end, trying to figure out what to do with her 16-year-old son whose grades were slipping horribly, asking constantly how I can get my teenager to study. She admitted that she’d been overly lax for some time because she felt guilty about being a single parent. She was “making up for it”  by being overly lenient—and she was also too concerned about what he’d think of her if she was more strict. Once she realized what she was doing, she decided it was okay for her son to temporarily dislike her, as it was in his best interest. She took away his phone rights for the weekend and didn’t allow him to manipulate her into getting his way, which he’d grown far too accustomed to. She sent me a message the next day, that just said, in all caps, “IT WORKED!!!”
Whether it’s your “fault” or theirs, isn’t the issue. What is important is getting curious. Set aside any judgment you have for yourself or them, and just get curious.
Once you’ve discovered the reasons behind your teen’s lack of motivation, you can start working on solutions. This is now the time for action! Is your teen feeling lost in a certain class? Get a tutor. Are they procrastinating homework until the last minute on Sunday nights—and often turning in his assignments late? Create a rule that says they cannot go out on Saturday night until all homework is finished. Are they focusing too much on socializing and distracted by electronics, friends sending texts, parties to organize? Create some new rules around time with friends and time on the phone. Sure, they may yell at you for taking the phone away for a few hours until they get all homework done, but being a great parent doesn’t always mean your kids will like you.
So, in short, it’s rather simple. Get curious—and then take action. Don’t be afraid to create limits, rules, and boundaries. Far too many parents worry about being their kid’s “friend” all the time. And while it’s lovely to be a friend to your teen, it’s equally important to be their parent. You’ve got this.

 

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